Top 10 reasons that Sheryl and Lance broke up

10. He wasn't strong enough to be her man. (If you don't know, this is a song of hers)
9. Ever since he retired Lance has been sitting on the coach watching Dr. Phil and eating Cheetos. Not very inspiring.
8. Lance mentioned to her that he likes Ullrich's new haircut.
7. When Lance retired Trek quit giving her free cycling equipment.
6. She was tired of driving around in a Subaru station wagon with a bike rack on top.
5. Sheryl outlawed watching the Discovery channel at her house. Ever.
4. Lance decided he was more of a mountain man and went looking for a women with bigger mountains.
3. Sheryl came home from the bike shop one day on a Surly. (steel is real!!)
2. Sheryl was tired of getting smoked on bike rides and wanted to ride with someone new.
1. She was tired of wearing yellow.

Bike Miles today: 0